Recently I came across this article, and it was so good, I wrote the author to obtain permission to share it with you. It's one of those "ouch" reads, but a blessing at the same time. Written by Richard Rohlin, of the Gentleman Adventurer, to his daughter, this article gives valuable advice to godly single women of all ages.
People You Shouldn’t Marry (Part 1 of 5)
“And
Ahab the son of Omri did evil in the sight of the LORD above all that were
before him.” (1Ki 16:30)
As of this last Friday,
my daughter, Tirza, is just six weeks old. This past weekend we took her for
her first serious roadtrip when we went out of town for a family member’s wedding.
As the bride came down the aisle, it was hard not to look down at the little
girl I held in my arms and wonder if that would be my daughter some twenty
years hence. I think most dads with daughters will agreewith me that no
thought is quite so terrifying.
What kind of woman will
she be? Who will she marry? Will it be someone who is good for her – a man who
will lead her in a loving and Christlike fashion? Will I have the discernment
to know the good men from the charletons and fakes? I pray that I will. But
while I am uncertain about many things regarding my daughter’s future and my
role in it, I am certain of one thing: I do not want her to marry an Ahab, nor
do I want her to be a Jezebel.
So Tirza, if you’re
reading this, all those years from now, this one’s for you.
You probably already know
about Ahab and Jezebel. You know that they were bad people. In fact, when your
mother and I chose your name, there was a long list of names from which we
could chosen – but Jezebel never even made the list. It’s synonymous today with
a wicked and morally loose woman, and there’s a good reason for that. The
original Jezebel set a precedent for wickedness that has ruined the name for
any future Jezebels who came after her.
Ahab wasn’t any saint,
either. In 1 Kings, we read that Ahab did more evil than any of the kings that
were before him. It actually goes into more detail than that, because we see
that Ahab knew he was evil and he took pleasure in it, his depraved heart
constantly looking for more ways to sin.
And it
came to pass, as if it had been a light thing for him to walk in the sins of
Jeroboam the son of Nebat, that he took to wife Jezebel the daughter of Ethbaal
king of the Zidonians, and went and served Baal, and worshipped him. (1Ki
16:31)
Ahab’s marriage to
Jezebel is listed as one of the greatest and most aggregious of his sins – and
there’s a good reason for that. Marriage changes you in ways that nothing else
will. If you marry well, as I believe I have, then it will be a wonderful
blessing that will draw you closer to God in ways unexplainable to a single
person. But if you, as a woman, marry an Ahab (or for a man, a Jezebel), it
will equally define your life for the worse.
One of the things that a
spouse will do is amplify everything aspect of your personality. That is, a
good spouse will draw out the good things and make them more so, and a bad
spouse will do the same with the bad things. In Ahab’s case, he was already a
wicked and idolatrous man, but it was through Jezebel that Baal-worship would first
be introduced to the Northern Kingdom of Israel. On the other hand, a good
spouse should make you more Christ-like; they are one of the tools that God
uses in the process of sanctification.
To be continued…
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